More Kenneth Williams than John Williams, this Carry On Cantina take on the Star Wars soundtrack is no Figrin D’an and the Modal Nodes.

Fronted by the imposing riff lord, Dark Vader, the triple guitar imperial assault might be note perfect but there are times when Grand Moff Tarkin needs to exert some serious creative control.

With a setlist limited to the Star Wars saga’s most identifiable tunes, this costumed quintet need to add some killer lines to their brutal shredding. Vader has never been a natural communicator but leading a band on a chilly night in Newcastle is very different to leading a legion of Stormtroopers on the ice planet of Hoth.

A hyperspeed blast through some of Sci-Fi’s most recognisable anthems was, of course, more fun than competing the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs. And it was over just as quickly.

Like Sarlacc grabbing Lando Calrissian in the pit of Carkoon, Galactic Empire’s take on the Main Theme gripped the crowd from the off.

The momentum was carried into The Imperial March but by the time Vader and his buddies had fired up The Force Theme it was clear that much-needed spark was missing. If only R2-D2 had been plugged into the sound desk or Max Rebo had jogged on from the wings to provide a jazzy cameo.

It’s easy to imagine Galactic Empire taking things to the next level backed by a dazzling light show bouncing off a giant Death Star glitterball and slave Leia dancers busting some moves (or was that a dream we’ve already had).

In fact this novelty act were born to play bigger stages in vacuous arenas befitting the biggest film franchise of all time. But for now Vader and his cronies need to find a way of transforming UK clubs into jumping hot dives where one wrong word could cost you a hand.


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